My Life’s Mission

As I have been wandering aimlessly this past week I have been constantly rushing on and on needing some answer to the great question concerning the eternal nature of Homosexuality. I recognize that this is not the matter of just a few months study, but the mission of a lifetime. I do not know if it can be discovered in my life because I dont think that the information to really “prove” anything can be found here on this earth. I think that it must come from the Lord. And while I would really like it to happen now, so that I can get on with living my life in righteousness and happiness rather than one or the other, I accept that it probably wont come as I feel I need it for a great while.
One of the main reasons that I am sure that this wont come for a while is precisely because my mind is constantly filled with the question. My mind is filled with my own desire, and the teachings I have been brought up in and this mixture leaves me blinded to, at this time, receive personal revelation. The problem is that I do not have very much practice in understanding and recognizing the Spirit and its personal revelation to me.
I am currently finding out if I can set things p so that I can spend a large amount of time to practicing this skill while also helping others. Hopefully I will be able to, but if not I will just have to find some other way to learn how to practice. So to all those who have been concerned for me, Thank You.